2. The old Lady it seems, took a Freak in her Head,
That her Daughter, grown Woman, might earn her own Bread,
Self applauding her Scheme, she was ready to Dance,
But we're often too sanguine in what we advance.
Refrain
3. For mark the Event: thus by fortune we're crost
Nor should people reckon without` their good Host;
The Daughter was sulky, and wouldn't come to,
And pray what in this Case could the Old Woman do?
Refrain
4. In vain did the Matron hold forth in the Cause,
That the young one was able; her duty, the Laws,
Ingratitude vile, Disobedience far worse;
But, she might e'en as well have sung Psalms to a Horse.
Refrain
5. Young, froward and sullen, and vain of her Beauty,
She tartly reply'd, that she well knew her Duty,
That other Folk's Children were kept by their Friends,
And that some Folks lov'd People but for their own Ends.
Refrain
6. She sobbed and blubber'd, she blustered and swore,
If her Mother persisted, she'd turn common Whore,
The old Woman thus threaten'd fell down in a Fit,
And who in the Nick should hop in but Will P—tt.
Refrain
7. "Zounds! Neighbour," quoth he, "what the Devil's the Matter?
A Man cannot rest in his House for your Clatter,"
"Alas!" cries the Daughter, "here's dainty fine Work,
The Old Woman's grown harder than Jew or than Turk."
Refrain
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8. "She be damned," says the Farmer and to her he goes
First roars in her ears then tweaks her old nose
"Hello, Good, what ails you? Wake woman, I say
I'm come to make peace in this desperate fray."
Refrain
9. "Ad zooks! Ope thine eyes what a bother is here,
You've no right to compel her, you have not I swear.
Be ruled by your friends, kneel down and ask pardon.
You'd be sorry I'm sure should she walk Convent Garden."
Refrain
10. "Alas!" cries the old woman, "and must I comply?
But I'd rather submit than the Hussy should die."
"Oh prithee be quiet, be friends and agree
You must surely be right if you're guided by me."
Refrain
11. Unwillingly awkward the Mother knelt down,
While the absolute Farmer went on with a Frown,
"Come kiss the poor Child, then come kiss and be friends,
There kiss your poor Daughter, and make her amends."
Refrain
12. "No thanks to you, Mother," the Daughter replied;
"But thanks for my friend here, I've humbled your pride.
Then pray leave off this Nonsense, 'tis all a mere Farce,
As I've carried my point, you may now kiss my —"
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